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An Open Letter to My Spouse Struggling with Depression - Nashville Moms I have suffered from depression for quite some time now. Im sorry that Ive been so unhappy lately. How Do I Write To My Husband About My Feelings? That way you are fulfilling your duty as a husband who helps a depressed wife.
}. But I need you to understand that I also need your support right now. When we first got married, you worked hard so that we could live in a nice house and afford nice things. Im sorry for hurting you, for the fights we have and for not being the wife you need me to be. Hoping you will cross the bridge and come over soon. Most importantly, I need you to be by my side. I am writing this to you with tears in my eyes and desperation in my heart. Take care of yourself: Caring for your own well-being will enable you to better support your wife. I think about it a lot, though how you might be better off with someone else. And I need you to be close to me. This article was originally published on Jan. 8, 2020. I miss us and the way we used to look at each other with love. My happiness is important too, though, and I feel like my husband is not the affectionate, romantic man I fell in love with. I wish we could go back in time and relive those moments where everything felt so right between us but sadly time keeps moving forward no matter how hard we try. I am writing to you in the hope that you will understand the situation and get back to me. I just wish we could be better partners too. I dont know if youve noticed, but Ive been feeling really down lately. No matter what you decide, writing . We dont laugh anymore. But I have to tell you the truth about how I feel. And, while some days are a struggle, I am still trying to learn that when you are unhappy, there may not be a root cause. 2. She co-founded Poetry Paradigm and is an executive body member of Indian Performance and Poetry Library. Just tell me you love me and leave me to calm down. Trust building is very important in a husband and wife relationship. Categories A letter to someone who hurt you, Read This If You Have Difficulty Getting Over An Almost Relationship. You tell me that you have a lot of work at work and dont have time for me or the kids but its not like that at all. You need to show me love and affection if you want our marriage to last as long as we hoped for. I need you to want me and I need to feel your love I havent felt it in ages and find myself yearning for a simple hug of reassurance. Love me back with that entirety. You used to be so passionate about our relationship, but now you just seem indifferent towards me. I have been living in this world for 28 years but never knew what it feels like to be so depressed and unhappy. Your email address will not be published. If we go longer than 4 days he starts in with the questions, accusations, threatening divorce.It makes me so sad and breaks my heart. I know my depression can seem selfish. And when you view me like that all the time, it hurts me so much. "mainEntity": [ And I shall continue to do all that for love. As a husband, you may have thoughts of leaving the marriage. Writing about your feelings can be beneficial in helping you understand your emotions and may help you discover other ways to express yourself to those you love. You hardly ever spend time with me anymore and when we are together it is always work related conversations or about the kids, or about other peoples problems. Bring Resources to the Table. You have been working so hard lately, and it seems like you never have time for me anymore. I understand. Your email address will not be published. If you truly dont want me and dont love me anymore, dont let me stop you. Related Reading: How I turned into a jealous monster. But I want you to know that I am here for you, and that when things get tough, I'll be there in spirit. Marriage is considered a beautiful thing especially when both couples understand each other and are sure of what they are going into. September 10, 2022 November 2, 2022. "@type": "Question", Youre happy when Im happy, and youre sad when Im sad. It hurts me to feel like Im the only one in this relationship whos trying to save it, but it also hurts to feel invisible and Im afraid of losing you. What changed and why did it have to change? Its been a long time since Ive felt like myself. I hope that one day you will be able to forgive me for the mistakes I have made during our years together as husband and wife. Now, we dont even fall asleep together and I feel so alone in that bed we bought together. Problem solver and a personal counselor. Instead, we cry without shedding a single tear. I have been feeling very depressed lately. Depression clouds my mind and fills me with horrid thoughts about howunlovable and worthless I am. Is the weather nice? My life wouldnt be the same without you in it and I dont even want to imagine it. You are always working, or at least it seems that way. That means something, and always will. It was a game we were playing. You didnt get mad. Instead, you listened and you encouraged me to do what I thought might help me. Feeling alone while youre with someone is worse than feeling alone while no ones there. How Do I Write A Letter To My Husband About My Feelings? Get hand-picked resources and highlights from our Mighty community straight to your inbox. Expert Verdict, Should You Contact The Person Your Spouse Is Cheating With The Pros And The Cons, 20 Things That Make Wives Unhappy In A Marriage, 13 Tell-Tale Signs A Man Is Unhappy In His Marriage, 25 Ways To Be A Better Wife And Improve Your Marriage, 9 Important Signs Your Husband Wants To Save The Marriage, 15 Signs Of Emotional Neglect In A Marriage, 20 Ways To Make Your Husband Miss You During Separation, 9 Ways To Deal With Your Husband Not Wanting You 5 Things You Can Do About It, 9 Expert Ways To Stop Your Husband From Yelling At You. I try to hide it from you because I dont want to worry you, but its been getting harder and harder to keep up the faade. At that time all I want you do to, is repeat the oath of forevermore to me. Her. Were not girlfriend and boyfriend anymore, we are husband and a wife. My entire world would collapse. Dont give up on our marriage. I dont see that spark in your eye when you look at me. I couldnt have ever imagined that being married was like being in a long-distance relationship. Communication is another. I love you dearly, more than anything in this whole world. You used to leave me little notes and kiss my forehead while Im asleep. My mind nags me and tells me other mommas do things better and love better than me. If youd like to participate, please send a blog post to. But weve been married for more than ten years, and nothing has changed between us. That beautiful smile you used to give me has disappeared too And I feel like Im the one to blame. Were not together anymore because you decided that you didnt want me anymore and decided that it was time for us to go our separate ways. And you had thought it was a boy! I know that things havent been perfect lately but that doesnt mean they cant get better again someday either! Dont you remember how we used to smile and how carefree we were about what tomorrow could bring? But we've been married for more than ten years, and nothing has changed between us. 2022. Go out there and find your soulmate if Im not that person to you. But today is a brighter day. Mum with depression pens heartfelt letter to husband. I know that marriages sometimes simply cant work, but doesnt ours at least deserve a chance? "text": "(Insert husband's name or nickname here), I'm writing you this letter to express my feelings. There are many ways by which a husband can deal with his wife without having to leave the marriage. Weve come a long way. I dont have to clear every misunderstanding that you might harbour. It is also known as major depressive disorder or clinical depression. Let me be a priority to you again and let me show you its worth it. A letter to my mother! That man used to smile every time hed see me, but now he doesnt smile anymore. But if you still want me and love me, I want you to know how Id feel if I lost you. I know that things change with time, but I never thought that our love would change. Because I love you so much, and I want to see you happy. Perhaps there were many reasons behind these changes in our lives, but all I know is that I am unable to live without you by my side anymore! When we first met, Id never beentruly close to a person whosuffered from long-term anxiety and severe depression. Because what good is a house if we arent happy? But if you dont want that anymore, I cant stop you. Every time you say a mean word, every time you push me away, you hurt me. Ive spent so many nights crying myself to sleep thinking about what we could have been if only we had made different choices along the way. Waiting. When you go through depression while in a marriage, theres a high possibility that you feel unhappy in the marriage and even fall out of love depending on the intensity of the effects the depression may have caused on the marriage. I know that were not in the honeymoon phase anymore and thats really okay. At times I wonder if the only reason you married me was to hurt me. Related Reading: 5 Unbelievably Weird Reasons Cited by Indians for Divorce. Depression and unhappiness can stem from a variety of causes, including: It is important to note that each individuals experience with depression and unhappiness is unique, and a combination of factors may be at play. I swing between feeling confused, enraged, ambivalent, distressed, sad, angry, frustrated, upset, embarrassed and depressed. Various factors, including a loss of control and abuse in a marriage, can cause depression. Every time I was down, youd pick me up and comfort me like no one else can do better than you do. 3. You were the best husband anyone could wish for, so why did it have to stop? I dont want our marriage to end like this, but I feel like there is nothing left for me here anymore. Remember the last time when my girlfriend had called? Rehab center, also known as rehabilitation is a drug addiction treatment to provide and give support and care to people who have problem with drug addiction, and depression and finds it difficult to put a stop to it. You had wanted to see my call log. Im willing to try to make it work again, but are you? I know I dont talk about these black clouds often, but I want to. Ive never told you how cold it feels when you look at me like youre looking at a ghost. Couple relationshipsthe pains and pleasures, the anxieties and comforts, the craziness and calm. Encourage professional help: If your wife is struggling with depression or unhappiness, it is important to encourage her to seek professional help. This is a very poignant letter written by a wife to a husband, who is insecure, suspicious and has serious trust issues. Letter to My Husband During Difficult Times: 8 Sample Letter Ideas for Different Situations. I feel like Im drowning in a sea of my own tears. This letter is like catharsisfor her. Sometimes it takes every bit of motivation to get up in the morning, but Ineverlet you in on this. I dont know how to start this letter. "name": "Can A Toxic Marriage Cause Depression? The choice depends on what you make. This is a letter from a wife to a husband where I talk about years of hurt and pain you have given me. Related Reading: Emotional abuse- 9 signs and 5 coping tips. Becci is a 31-year-old mum to two young boys. I was not properly equipped to handle the effects of mental illness, nor was I ready to deal with the perceived backlash I thought could only be my fault. And I keep that hurt in my heart. I wonder, will I cope? But know that this time this time I will be ready. This letter from wife to husband was written after years of fighting, yelling, hurting and dealing with marriage issues. I know that no one can ever take your place in my life. } I loved you as soon as I saw you and knew we were meant to be. I need your love and for you to show me the affection you used to. But whatever the reason for my unhappiness, theres no denying that its real and that it mattersto me and to our marriage. The conclusion can have some suggestions or decisions you have taken or want to take in a bid for a positive resolution. Night. But I have to tell you the truth about how I feel. You dont have to tell me you love me every day or try to convince me that Im beautiful to you. But, truth be told, Im falling apart already and I cant take it anymore. I had married a lover, not a detective who is out to sniff out mysteries all the time. Template: 3. Whats tearing us apart, making us seem so far away from each other even on those rare occasions when we hug? But you still stay and try to be happy for the both of us. You know how I may struggle with words when it comes to emotions, so I thought I'd offer you something physical to express how I've been feeling. Without it, Im not even a wife Im just a person who makes sure all the housework is done. It appears you entered an invalid email. Whyd you thought I hide things from you? I know that you would do anything for me. Because I'm tired of all the things we leave unsaid. Continue the conversation." I'm not happy. I want to be with the man I used to kiss whenever hed walk out the door Not the man who doesnt even tell me that hes heading out. "An unhappy marriage chronically feels bad. It feels like we have lost our connection with each other and there isnt anything left between us anymore except for our daughter who sleeps in her own room at night while we sit on opposite ends of our king size bed watching TV shows. But its just like the sun, always existing even if not always seen. When I look into the mirror, I see an old woman instead of a young girl like before. Encourage professional help: If your wife is struggling with depression or unhappiness, it is important to encourage her to seek professional help. Depression is vile a vile, nasty monster. But today, I feel like the world has fallen on me, and I cant bear the pain anymore. But you were still there. Tips And Coping Advice, 13 Common Things Husbands Do To Destroy Their Marriage. 3. You can also request feedback in the conclusion.
Male depression: Understanding the issues - Mayo Clinic Itotally get it. "text": "Stress from a toxic relationship can cause a number of symptoms, such as sleep difficulties, appetite changes, and reduced immunity. The life we had before was amazing; we were happy together, but now it feels like everything has changed overnight. , { I dont know where to begin. Underneath the dark clouds of depression, I promise there is a gleaming smile. How to Discuss Your Depression with Your Partner 1. How Do I Write A Letter To My Husband About My Feelings? I love you so much and I just want to make you happy. (Insert husband's name or nickname here), I'm writing you this letter to express my feelings. "@type": "Answer", It appears you entered an invalid email. You might have understandable reasons to be mentally composing your packing list. Im here. We have 2 teenagers freshman and 8th grade and now our youngest. I guess what Im trying to say here is that something needs to change. I cannot go on living like this anymore.
I'm stuck in an unhappy marriage | Relate , { It hurts so much because I am so in love with my husband. I know that things arent always easy between us like they used to be when we first got married years ago because of how busy both of us have been lately with work. "@context": "https://schema.org", You have changed me from being a happy person to a sad depressed one. Becci is very honest, brutally honest, and prides herself on this. Ive left my virginity for you. And my husband is always kind and good, but I think I am neglected! Sometimes I lay awake at night and worry about things that wont even happen. And you had asked me who it was and I had said her name and you said I had lied. I've never told you how cold it feels when you look at me like you're looking at a ghost. Instead, I dont even feel loved by you. You did this without even giving me an explanation as to why you felt this way and what exactly made you think that ending our marriage would be best for both of us? When the clouds clear, you see it, but when its cloudy, you dont. And I need help. You are not happy anymore and neither do I feel happy living with you anymore. You never have time for me anymore, and I dont know if that will ever change. If you need support right now, call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. Were adults, a family. Were meant to be best friends and lovers. Why are you suspicious all the time? Letter Telling Your Husband You Are Not Happy. The distance between us started to widen and our love language changed We barely even talk and I feel neglected and hopeless. And then when we do go out and have fun together, the next day I feel like all of those feelings have been lost again in our daily routine of work and chores around the house. We are both near retirement age, have been married for fourteen years - estranged for about ten. Just like you have always been there for me, I will always be there for you. After all weve been through, I think it does and Ive started feeling like its not an option youd consider anymore. Hi sweetheart, The time is difficult but my husband you are not. "name": "How Do You Tell Your Partner You're Depressed? To be honest, Id fall apart. I used to be so happy when we were first married but now everything has changed and it feels like we are just roommates living under the same roof instead of husband and wife who should love each other unconditionally no matter what happens! Did I do something to you that caused things to be this way? The times I would catch you crying and you would try to hide it in a (poor) attempt to smooth everything over. Thank you for understanding when I cant put a meal on the table and getting us takeout. Im feeling like my husband hates me and if thats so, I dont want to stop you from walking away. She has authored \'Corazon Roto and Sixty Nine Other Treasons\'(2015), has co-edited two poetry anthologies, \'Dawn Beyond the Waste\'(2016) and \'Cologne of Heritage\'(2017), and has been published widely in journals both nationally and internationally. 2022 Mighty Proud Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Follow us at: This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on our website. I know how much you love me and how much you want me to be happy. Most of the time I wont. You know how I may struggle with words when it comes to emotions, so I thought I'd offer you something physical to express how I've been feeling. -Kacey. Continue the conversation. Theyd been merelybuzzwords thrown around too many times by peoplewho couldnt think of another way to describe their daily frustrations. Knowing this you can then go ahead to adopt strategies that can best help or are suitable for the treatment and recovery of your depressed wife.